When I look into your eyes
I can see a love restrained
But darlin' when I hold you
Don't you know I feel the same
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain
Siren's Song
Sunday, March 21, 2004
There is no time. I can only hope everything turns out well. I'm so incredibly screwed up now that it's almost farcical.
Have I meddled too much with corporate affairs? Have I caused waves of ripples that ultimately rebound off the wall and hit me? Have I painted a much too glossy picture of myself and my qualifications? Have I...
There is nothing to worry about right now. No, there isn't. (I hope.)
All I know is that... there is no time. Walls are closing in to crush and gnaw my bones.
I'm so overwhelmed by the sequence of events right now that... I can't recognize where they stem from anymore.
And I am not free to blog. I am not. I seldom blog about my academic pursuits, nor my concrete, tangible aspirations. Those are not words to be put down for show or bold exhibits of a hubristic egomaniac, and are kept in an intricate box in a little corner in my heart. Traces of Net presence is alright, not too much, or they might incriminate you and get you into undesirable circumstances.
Where can I flush out such noisome thoughts? Who is close enough to understand them, and regard and analyze them from a netural, sagely point of view, and not be overwhelmed or sodden by my self-absorbed catharsis?
A friend, set me thinking last night. About what he has told me; about what others have told me. It's just a realization, nothing much. But I'll accept it with Zen-esque peace.
Did I speak to my baah-baah last night? I think I did, but I can't remember what we talked about. Was I in a state of sleep daze? Does natural rest shut down my mental faculties as much as alcohol does to many others, so much so that I'm not even aware of the happenings around me?
